Anxiety

How to deal with narcissism

Whether it’s a co-worker, friend and family member, almost everyone knows someone with a narcissistic personality. Those with a narcissistic personality have an elevated sense of self-importance. They have a sense that they are in charge (at work and home), believe their ‘uniqueness’ can only be understood by a select few, and can require excessive admiration.   For those who work or live with the narcissist, life can become so complicated; you wish the narcissist would just “quit it”. Unfortunately, that’s not an option. As hard as it is to hear, narcissism is something to be dealt with – not necessarily something that can be overcome.   The good news is armed with the right strategies; you can learn to co-exist with the narcissist(s) in your life.   Lower Your Expectations – As you’ll never receive total emotional nurturing in a narcissistic relationship, ensure you keep your expectations realistic. When you’re with them, try to magnify their good qualities, while understanding they are somewhat emotionally limited. Accepting this truth will help you stop asking for something your family member, spouse or co-worker is unable to give (e.g. unconditional love, emotional support, etc.).   Strategise Your Needs – Due to a lack of empathy, narcissists have a lot of troubles focusing on the needs of others – even loved ones. So, ensure you don’t bother them with every little issue that crops up. When you need them to do something for you, ask for their help. To achieve a good result, ask for assistance in areas they are interested or gifted in.   Never Make Your Self-Worth Dependent on Them – Whatever you do, don’t get caught in the trap of trying to please a narcissist. […]

Treating Anxiety

Are you mentally and physically exhausted, consumed with worry to the point that it interferes with every aspect of your life? If so, you are suffering some form of anxiety. When you are caught in the vice-like grip of anxiety, it can be nearly impossible to imagine ever being free. Fortunately, however, anxiety can be effectively treated. For the vast majority of patients, their quality of life improves dramatically. Read on for treatment options for various forms of anxiety.   Treating Generalised Anxiety – There is a plethora of ways to treat Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD); so choose one (or a combination) which suits you.   Changing thought patterns – When you worry, you engage in negative self-talk about trying circumstances. While you may think worrying is preparing you to face the worst-case scenario, more often than not, it is unproductive. Once you give up the idea that worrying is helpful, you can challenge these irrational fears and learn to accept that life has uncertainties.   Connect with others – GAD often leaves you feeling powerless and alone. However, the more connected you are, the less vulnerable you’ll feel. Building a strong support system will dramatically improve your physical and emotional health while providing confidence that someone will always be there for you.   Self-management techniques like these are sufficient for most GAD sufferers. However, if you still feel overburdened, seek professional help.   Treating Hereditary Anxiety – According to common belief, hereditary traits and problems are hardwired and therefore, can’t be fixed. Fortunately, this is not the case for hereditary anxiety. Traditional anxiety treatments, such as medication, cognitive behavioural therapy and self-care techniques are just as effective in treating hereditary anxiety.   Treating Organic […]

By |Wednesday, August 12, 2015|Anxiety, General, Wellness| Comments

How To Avoid Burnout

Are you constantly looking toward the next deadline? Do you have trouble saying ‘no’ and continually find yourself over committed? If so, you may be suffering from burnout. Burnout can turn even the most routine of problems into a seemingly insurmountable mountain. This state of mind causes havoc with relationships, work and health. However, with the right motivation and coping strategies, burnout can become a thing of the past.   The term “burnout” was coined by Hebert Freudenberger, in his 1974 novel Staff Burnout. Burnout is a work-specific syndrome, which is becoming commonplace with constant workplace changes. Burnout is mental and physical exhaustion caused by excessive, prolonged stress. It occurs when you feel overwhelmed and unable to meet constant demands. Burnout reduces productivity and steals energy, leaving you feeling hopeless, cynical and resentful. Eventually, you feel you have nothing left to give.   The adverse effect of burnout spills out into every area of life – home and social life. Burnout causes long-term bodily changes, making you vulnerable to infections (e.g. colds). The primary causes of burnout include: feeling one has no control over one’s work, lack of recognition and unclear, overly demanding expectations. The condition is supplemented by lifestyle and personality outside of the workplace. Factors include:   Lack of sleep Absence of close/personal relationships High expectations from too many people Working to the point of having no relaxation or social life A pessimistic outlook While burnout sounds a lot like stress, they are entirely different issues. Stress is characterised by over-engagement while burnout is characterised by disengagement. Burnout produces helplessness, a loss of motivation, ideas and hope.   By adopting the right coping strategies, you can significantly lessen the impact of burnout on […]

Pre-trial Counselling

Many of us, have no experience of the courtroom. Courtrooms are worlds of their own, in that they have processes and language that are second nature to those who regularly inhabit this world, although as incomprehensible to those of us who don’t. For those who are a victim or are a witness giving evidence in a trial, the court can be quite an emotionally distressing experience. For example, the process of a cross-examination, where the opposing lawyer attempts to discredit the witness, can be very intimidating. Lawyers do not care if they intimidate you or come across aggressive; they simply want to find a weakness and create uncertainty for the jury to doubt the validity of the witness’s testimony. Unfortunately, there is no support system offered by the courts to help deal with the rigours of going to court. However, there are external services available. Alegna Solutions has a pre-trial counselling service to help improve self-esteem and self-confidence, as well as prepare victims and witnesses for the experience of court. Pre-trial counselling is a way of preparing. It covers basic things like the roles of the different people within the court and basic information about legal processes, so you are not walking in blind. Courts can be confusing places although if you go into them with a little knowledge it can be much less daunting. Pre-trial counselling will help make sense of the process and be aware of what is expected of you as a witness, and what to expect as a witness. Alegna solutions recommend pre-trial counselling especially for people, who are vulnerable, intimidated or who have experienced trauma. In the UK, the Crown Prosecution Service is reviewing its stance towards pre-trial counselling in […]

How to Manage Anxiety

Anxiety – that unwelcome intruder which leaves unmerited fear, racing hearts and minds and utter confusion in its wake. Whether we’re nervous about a big presentation or a first date, we all face anxiety from time to time.   Anxiety is an individualised feeling, with no two people experiencing it the same way. However, there are several commonalities that distinguish it from other disorders. Prominent features include ongoing worry, obstructive thoughts, confusion, sweating, nausea and restlessness, among others.   Sometimes it can be a good thing. Anxiety usually forces us to assess a situation and formulate an appropriate response. Problems arise when anxiety becomes a ‘default setting’ which impacts on your everyday life. The techniques below can help you self-manage anxiety, so it does not overtake your life.   IDENTIFY TRIGGER FACTORS The first step to anxiety management is identifying situations that make you anxious. The best way, to do this, is keeping a journal of symptoms and what is happening around you when anxiety occurs. Keeping a record of why and how your anxiety occurs will help you manage this situation better in the future.   PROBLEM SOLVING Once you have identified the specific situation(s) causing your anxiety, structured problem-solving can help resolve anxiety by addressing the underlying problem. Follow these steps to get to the root of the problem:   Identify the problem Formulate as many options as possible to solve it Select your preferred option Develop a plan to test the viability of that option If this option doesn’t solve the problem, try others   RELAXATION TECHNIQUES People in a constant state of anxiety claim they have trouble relaxing. Relaxation promotes a physical and mental feeling of calm. Learning and practising a […]